I truly understand that in today’s world of instant information it’s very easy to become overwhelmed and maybe a little callous. Kind of like giving a hard time to telemarketers that call our homes around dinner time. It is easy to forget it is a human being just trying to make a living on the other end of the line. Perhaps someone’s son or daughter trying to pay their way through college.

A long time ago I decided I was going to do everything I could to be NICE—REALLY nice, to everyone I spoke with—no matter what the circumstances and whether I knew them or not.

Because in my career, I have been on the other end of the stick many times.

And something that just happened to me this morning REMINDED me of my commitment and how important it is for us all to be gracious when we network.

But first let’s go waaayyy back to my days as an executive recruiter. As a job seeker, you will bend over backward to have a good conversation with a recruiter right? Well as a recruiter who continuously had to cold call and have conversations with employed executives—sometimes my call would elicit hostility. Executives would tell me “DON’T CALL ME AGAIN!” or would grill me “HOW DID YOU GET MY NUMBER?!” or, “I AM NOT INTERESTED IN ANY OF YOUR JOBS!!”

It always amazed me. And often a year or two later many of those executives would call me for help because they found themselves in a job search. You can imagine how “eager” I was to help place them with one of my beloved client companies.

Which leads me to this morning’s incident. Interestingly, a recruiter had requested to connect with me on LinkedIn—which I accepted. I always send follow up email to my new connections to thank them for reaching out to connect and I invite them to sign up for my free newsletter. This particular recruiter emailed me back and said “TAKE ME OFF YOUR LIST IMMEDIATELY!” I decided to personally email her back and explain she was a connection, and I had simply invited her to sign up for my e-zine with a link.

Here is what my new LinkedIn connection wrote back: “LET ME REPHRASE: DON’T SEND ME ANY MORE EMAILS!!”

I promptly removed this recruiter from my LinkedIn connections.

This is a PERFECT example of what we should never, ever do. As we network, we simply can’t afford to be rude or mean. So . . . here are some networking tips I have found very useful that I would like to share with you:

1. In your career, strive to be nice to EVERYBODY no matter their station or basis of relationship. You just never know when the tables may turn and who wants to spread bad energy around?
2. If you must say NO to somebody, do so as graciously and professionally as possible.
3. If someone or something around you is negative, cut off communication, if possible. Leaders and professionals who are serious about their careers protect their inner circle and filter the information they “let in.”
4. When networking, think: “How can I help?” If you will always lead with thinking about the other person, you will be showing them honor and respect and they will repay you naturally in kind. Long term, this is the true core of networking. It doesn’t matter if your connection is in person, on LinkedIn, Facebook, or phone . . . strive for consistency in all you do.
5. If someone you are talking to is rude or negative—do not get defensive. This includes all the things that can potentially happen to you in a job search such as someone promising they will call you, or invite you back for an interview, but never do.
6. Find a mentor who holds a high visibility position—one whose personality you admire—and then emulate them. If you are lucky enough to know several executive mentors, you will start to see a pattern. Leaders/Mentors generally have a certain likeability . . . a charisma, if you will, for various reasons—some are attractive because they are fair and do the right thing, others because they want to foster the potential in you, and still others because they are warm and kind.
7. Whomever you are speaking to, try to find a positive thing about that person that you can complement him or her on. Whenever I have the opportunity to speak to someone new, I LOVE figuring out what that one thing is that I can compliment them on. Sometimes it is their photo, other times it is something about their voice, their personality, or their career. This becomes a good habit and you will find yourself focusing on the positive more versus the negative in your daily dealings with others.
8. If you make a practice of focusing on and helping others, at some point you may feel used or that you have not gotten back what you have put in. This goes with the territory. Don’t let it deter you from your course to develop a good reputation, overall virtue, and will ultimately make you a better person.

I feel fortunate that I have been humbled by the above types of experiences over the years because it gives me an excuse to take a bad thing and turn it around to reflect something positive. I hope you can take one thing from the list above and share the love.

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Do you know someone who is looking for a new job? I bet you wish you could help them, but maybe you think you can’t because you don’t know of any open positions that would fit them? Well, there are lots of ways to help job seekers even if you can’t offer them their dream job. Here are seven tips you can use right now to help your friends and associates that may be in a job search:

Tip #1: Offer to give their resume to a key decision maker in your company
As long as your comfortable with it, why not pass along their resume? You never know when a position might come up or even be created to meet a need!

Tip #2: Invite them to join your network on LinkedIn
The bigger a job seeker’s LinkedIn network, the more chances they’ll have to find and connect with others! The tipping point on LinkedIn is about 65 connections, so you see, it doesn’t take much to quickly create a powerful network!

Tip#3: Endorse them (on LinkedIn), give them a recommendation or offer to be a reference
You don’t have to have been their boss to recommend or endorse them. So, if you can, why not brag a little on the strengths and skills you know they have?

Tip #4: Tell them about my free ezine and article library!
They can sign up here: www.maryelizabethbradford.com.

Tip#5: Hear them out
Let them share what they are looking for with you in terms of ideal industries and positions. Do you know ANYONE in their industry of choice that they could network with? You don’t have to know if they are hiring or not – every connection counts and could potentially lead to something else!

Tip #6: Invite them out
Do you attend chamber events, church functions, fundraisers or association meetings? Why not invite them along? Job seekers benefit from the opportunity to make new contacts and connections, PLUS it’s good for them to get out of the house and stay involved!

Tip #7: Be positive
Job seekers need positive support and to keep focused on opportunities rather than bad economic conditions and negative news. This is one of the most powerful ways you can support them…with your positive attitude!

My clients are finding and landing jobs every day – the jobs ARE out there and so is help and support. Be sure to remind them of this.

So, do you have additional ways that you have been supporting and assisting your job seeking friends and associates? Please share your helpful ideas here!

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Kathy Simmons recently wrote in her Netshare Newsletter about her participation in several NETSHARE Area Meetings, networking with very talented executives across the country.

Career coaches and attendees shared their tips and tricks for mining LinkedIn, targeting hiring companies, and researching new job opportunities. And at every meeting, at least one contact received a solid lead on the spot (thats powerful stuff!).

Here are some of the takeaways she shared:

Targeting companies isn’t about limiting your options, it’s about prioritizing them.
People want to help you, make it easier for them.
People know people, people don’t know jobs.
Conduct a people search not a job search.
Instead of looking for a job, look for work.
You have to be prepared to answer one of these three questions: Can you make me money? Can you save me money? Can you get me through the next six months?
No matter what you did before, now you’re in marketing and sales.

People want to help you, but unless you can give them a place to start, they can’t. As one of the group members said, “People know people, they don’t know jobs.” If you tell me you want a senior level marketing job in a consumer packaged goods company, chances are that the best I can do is promise to let you know if I hear anything. But, tell me you are interested in working for Nabisco, I suddenly remember that my cousin works for Nabisco.

I agree. BTW NETSHARE’s newsletter is excellent…and free. Check it out at www.netshare.com

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“Phone Networking Secrets Revealed!”
This Special Report is for anyone who has ever dreaded the “follow up phone call” after sending a resume! You will discover step-by-step EXACTLY what to say to friends and associates when networking, how to follow up with corporate decision makers, human resources and even the best techniques for leaving voice mails!

Packed with easy to use tips and techniques and LOTS of phone scripts for various situations so you can confidently make the phone calls you need to reach critical contacts, gain referrals and secure interviews.

If you KNOW you cringe when you even think about picking up the phone to make these calls then please, don’t wait another minute! Do yourself a favor and get your copy today. You’ll find all the details here…

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Networking is one of those dreaded and feared activities that each job seeker must face throughout their career. However, it’s also well known that well over 50% of jobs are landed through some form of networking!

Here are 5 tips to get you started in your networking success:

Tip One: Stand Up and Smile

When networking on the phone stand up and smile! No kidding, it improves your tone and your energy level.

Tip Two: Create a Simple Script

When you are at a networking event or following up on the phone, create a short, simple script and practice it out loud a few times. You will be amazed how much more comfortable and confident you will feel with this extra foundation of support!

Tip Three: Create a List

Create a list of everyone you know to ask them if they have any information on your industry of choice. Your list can include friends, associates, family, people you worship with and people with whom you do business such as your banker, CPA or your realtor.  People I do business with are my favorite networks because I am their customer and people in service industries completely understand the benefits of networking.

Tip Four: Social Networking

Even if you are not on Linkedin or Face book, it’s never too late to sign up! You will be amazed how quickly you can build a network, join groups and get the word out through social networking.

Tip Five: Don’t Ask For a Job

Networking is best done in a diplomatic way that puts the focus of interest on the person you are talking to. This is primarily true when meeting someone for the first time but is also true when asking for mentoring from someone in an industry you wish to get into.

When you are networking with your friends and associates in order to gather information be sure to ask only if they know of anyone in your industry of interest that may be able to give you some guidance. This takes the pressure off and increases your positive responses. If you show up, so to speak, the job interviews will come.   

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